It’s time to fire up the hate again, as our Tigers limp into this weekend coming off a devastating win over Troy, and sit at a disappointing 2-0. The South Carolina St. Bulldogs will make a three-hour death march from Orangeburg into the Upstate to face a rabid Clemson team bent on redemption. I’m only going with 5 hates this week in preparation for a short week against the pests from Atlanta next Thursday, but they are important hates, and should not be overlooked.
Coot Stink: The piquant chicken manure smell emanating from the South Carolina St. sideline comes from defensive coordinator Kirk Botkin. Botkin spent the last 5 years coaching linebackers for USCe. I hate USCe, and while Botkin no longer resides in South Carolina’s version of Dante’s 9th circle of hell, it takes several years for the stench to subside.
Questionable Recruiting: The Bulldogs starting defensive ends are named Gregtavious and Tyberious and are obviously time travelers from ancient Rome, making them ineligible in my book. I hate time travelers almost more than hate Coot Stink…almost…
Poor Mascot Breeding: Look, I get it, bulldogs are cute, but my wife is a vet, and she is quick to point out that they are overbred genetic train wrecks. You want a purebred bulldog? Well, you had better have a few thousand dollars set aside for chronic skin and breathing problems. My wife hates dealing with bulldogs.
They Scared Me In 2013: Things were going according to plan in 2013, with Clemson dominating SC State in the second quarter. I was comfortably sipping a beer and enjoying the day when Tajh rolled out and took a big shot to the ribs from a SC State player. Tajh rolled around on the ground like he all of his ribs were shattered and I was forced to drink a 6 pack while waiting for him to get off the ground. He was fine, but I was momentarily terrified, and I hate being terrified.
Too Close to USCe: If you remove the State from South Carolina State you get South Carolina. If you remove the blue from their color scheme you end up with a burgundy team. That’s right, South Carolina State is only one word and one dropped color away from being a maroon clad South Carolina, and that my friends, is close enough to hate.