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(12) Georgia Bulldogs (2-1, 0-1 SEC)
Vaporized Troy one million-billion to... I mean 66-0. The most surprising thing about this game was the fact that Todd Gurley didn't lead the team in rushing (then again, you don't use a stick of dynamite on an anthill, so no need to play him too much). It's been 20 years since Georgia has scored this many points. Despite the lopsidedness of the talent, Hutson Mason apparently decided not to run up his passing numbers - and he still threw two touchdowns. Troy is really bad.
South Carolina State Bulldogs (2-2, 0-0 MEAC)
Defeated Furman - 21st in the FCS ranked Furman - 17-7, a win sealed by a Jalen Simmons touchdown run with 2:24 left. This came after Furman was forced to punt from their 18, and that kick was returned to the three yard line. SC State was bad at stopping the pass, but the Paladins were bad at stopping the run. In other news, it's weird seeing two teams Clemson usually schedules play each other. We're looking into the secret lives of cupcakes!
North Carolina Tar Heels (2-1, 0-0 ACC)
Boarded and sunk by East Carolina, 70-41. These were not self-inflicted wounds as no turnovers and penalties were responsible - UNC just got their doors blown off by a superior offense. Giving up 789 total yards (446 passing, 343 rushing) will lead to 70 points pretty much all the time ever. Shane Carden went 30/48 for 438 and four scores. Wow. East Carolina had two 100-yard receivers and Breon Allen ran for 211 yards on 18 carries. Just, wow.
N.C. State Wolfpack (4-0, 0-0 ACC)
A terribly surprising win against Presbyterian, 42-0. Jacoby Brisset went 14/21 for 195 and three touchdowns. The Blue Hose's best chance to actually score anything came in the third, but they managed to miss a field goal from something like seven yards out of the end zone, which is amazing in its own way. This was a game in the same fashion that Murray State was hickory-smoked by Louisville, so not really a game at any point.
Louisville Cardinals (3-1, 1-1 ACC)
Accidentally stole FIU's vowels 34-3. In week four, trends start to become apparent. Here, it's obvious that Louisville does well against teams with no defenses. They gained 324 of their 336 total yards passing, which makes me wonder how FIU held them to 12 official rushing yards. Those are Wake Forest numbers. Will Gardner did the thing again with 295 yards in the air. By the way... how did Louisville end up at FIU for this? Scheduling is weird.
Boston College Eagles (3-1, 0-0 ACC)
Caused a powder explosion in Maine's magazine, winning 40-10. While BC poked about early on, still basking in their USC win, eventually someone pressed the Tyler Murphy button and the game was secured. He ran for two scores, threw for another (although he didn't get many yards in the process), and generally just muddled about. As did all the BC players, but hey, it's Maine. No harm done.
Syracuse Orange (2-1, 0-0 ACC)
Lost 34-20 to Maryland, therefore bringing great shame upon their house-I mean conference. Thanks to an interception returned for a touchdown and a punt returned for a touchdown by William Likely, plus 280 passing yards from C.J. Brown, the Orange didn't lead after a field goal early in the first. Terrel Hunt did okay, passing for 219 and rushing for 156, but Syracuse simply wouldn't stop shooting itself in the foot with penalties and missed field goals.
Wake Forest Demon Deacons (2-2, 0-0 ACC)
Defeated Army 24-21, which was highly unpatriotic of them. Brace yourself: Wake gained 100 yards of rushing. John Wolford was the real star, however, going 25/35 for 238 and two scores. He lead Wake on a touchdown drive halfway through the fourth quarter, and then his defense held on for dear life against Army's weird triple-option thing. Yes, they gave up 341 rushing yards, but that offense is like Georgia Tech's. It requires four sports degrees to understand, much less defend.
Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets (4-0, 1-0 ACC)
Defeated Virginia Tech 27-24. They just won't lose! While the bee wizards put up the weird sort of offense you'd expect - Justin Thomas passed for 125 and ran for 165, for instance - defense was what won this game. Michael Brewer was intercepted thrice, one of which was taken back for a score. In a strange twist of fate, the Coastal actually makes sense for one week, as Georgia Tech is clearly in command. Until they lose to Virginia and/or Duke, anyway.
Georgia State Panthers (1-3, 0-0 Sun Belt)
Run over by Washington (not that Washington, the purple one) 45-14. After an oddly scoreless first quarter, the Panthers got two touchdowns and lead 14-0 at the half, and then... well, GSU fumbled, which lead to a score, then there were interceptions. As a bonus, the GSU offense became completely impotent. On the plus side, the Panthers' pass defense held up pretty well. Also, like Wake before them, I can't figure out how GSU ended up on a random western road game.
(13) South Carolina Gamecocks (3-1, 2-1 SEC)
Dropped anchor on Vanderbilt, 48-34, but it wasn't easy. The Commodores scored twice in the first, only to see South Carolina get a field goal and two scores of their own in the second. In the third, both teams traded points until Pharoh Cooper dropped a 70 yard run with 5:57 left. Even after Vanderbilt fumbled, which lead to another touchdown for the Gamecocks, they still managed to score one more touchdown. This sort of looks like a step back for South Carolina's defense, given that they gave up 156 rushing yards to someone not named Todd Gurley.